terrible gifts for christmas

This candle smells nice enough to pretend it’s a thoughtful gift, but the packaging screams “I picked this because it’s cheap.” It’s the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to avoid awkward questions about why you’re buying it. The scent alone won’t fix your relationship with the recipient.

A Valentine’s Day gift that’s basically a scented novelty—great for someone who already has everything. The “women’s” label is just a marketing trick to make it feel less like a terrible gift.

This shirt lets you vent your frustration with a meme while wearing it, but it’s so generic it could be anyone’s. It’s the perfect gift if you want to make someone’s day worse with a joke they’ll forget in a week. The long sleeves add a weirdly specific touch.

If you’re the type who needs a physical object to feel slightly less terrible, this is your ticket. The “80s” reference is so vague it’s almost insulting. Wear it to make your own suffering feel justified.

This paddle is designed to embarrass your dad into laughing, but it’s so poorly made it’ll break before he even tries. It’s the kind of gift that turns a bad moment into a worse one. The “terrible dancing” theme is so obvious it’s almost a compliment.

A last-ditch effort to make someone’s life slightly less awkward—if you’re okay with the mess. The “fun for all” claim is laughable unless you’re the one who’s actually fun. Not recommended.

These gift bags look festive enough to fool a child, but they’re so flimsy they’ll rip before Christmas. They’re the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to look like you care more than you do. The “treat tote” label is a joke—it’s just a bag.

A cheap, disposable gift that’s basically a paper bag with a holiday logo. If you’re buying this, you’re already in the wrong mindset. Skip it.

These money holders look fancy enough to impress a bank teller, but they’re just plastic with a silly design. They’re the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to pretend you’re giving a real gift. The “festive” label is a lie.

A gift card holder that’s so basic it’s almost insulting. If you’re trying to make someone’s day better, this isn’t the way. Skip to the real gift.

This ribbon is green enough to make a leprechaun jealous, but it’s so thin it’ll unravel before you even tie a knot. It’s the kind of thing you’d use if you wanted to look like you’re putting effort into a terrible gift. The “St. Patrick’s” label is a cheap joke.

A ribbon that’s so cheap it’s practically free. If you’re buying this, you’re already failing at gift-giving. Skip it.

These gift bags are so big they could hold a small dog, but they’re so flimsy they’ll collapse before opening. They’re the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to look like you’re giving a real gift. The “jumbo” label is a lie.

A giant, useless bag that’s basically a paper sack with a holiday logo. If you’re buying this, you’re already in the wrong mindset. Skip it.

These tissues are so thick they could double as paper towels, but they’re so red they look like they’re made of paint. They’re the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to make someone’s day worse. The “Christmas” label is a joke.

A tissue assortment that’s so over-the-top it’s almost offensive. If you’re buying this, you’re already failing at gift-giving. Skip it.

These socks are so soft they could be used as a pillow, but they’re so ugly they could be used as a napkin. They’re the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to make someone’s day worse. The “princess” label is a lie.

A baby sock set that’s so cheap it’s practically free. If you’re buying this, you’re already in the wrong mindset. Skip it.

This gift card is so generic it could be from any store, but it’s still a waste of money. It’s the kind of thing you’d give if you wanted to pretend you’re giving a real gift. The “physical” label is a joke.

A $100 card with a $5.95 fee—basically a $105 waste of money. If you’re buying this, you’re already failing at gift-giving. Skip it.